


The New Three's Company

by waketosleep



Category: Leverage
Genre: First Time, Humor, Multi, Negotiations, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-24
Updated: 2011-06-24
Packaged: 2017-10-20 16:33:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/214774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waketosleep/pseuds/waketosleep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Parker cons Hardison and Eliot into a relationship and Eliot may never see his pants again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The New Three's Company

**Author's Note:**

> I've watched two seasons of Leverage in about a week. Thanks, Netflix instant, for ruining my life!

The front door of Parker's latest bolt-hole was green, which Hardison thought kind of suited her. She didn't have a lot of stuff beyond essentials, either--overstuffed couch, TV for watching heist movies so she could either laugh or get awful ideas (it was never really clear which was the goal), bed, basic kitchen stuff. There was also the climbing gear that Nate wouldn't let her leave at his place and an emergency bag in case she had the luxury of time to grab it.

Somehow it seemed cozy anyway. Parker beamed at Hardison when she opened the door for him.

"What's up," he said as he stepped inside. It was as neat as ever in there. She seemed not to like making messes unless it was necessary.

Parker shrugged and Hardison went to sit on the couch.

"You want something to drink?" she asked. "I have, uh, water. From the tap. And milk, but I mostly keep that for the cereal."

Hardison couldn't judge, since that wasn't far off from his own kitchen (just replace the milk with orange soda--he usually ate his cereal dry out of the box, by the handful). "Nah, I'm good," he said.

She smiled and sat on the couch sideways, facing him. He wondered if this was a booty call or if she had some whacked plan to rope him into that she couldn't tell Nate about. Her hair was damp and kind of curling around her face. He had a little flashback to the week before, when they were in her tiny bedroom, and hoped to all that was holy that he was here on a booty call.

"So why'd you call me?" he asked, trying for smooth as he stretched out against the couch, his arm reaching across the back in her direction.

Parker gave him a sly smile--oh, yeah--and opened her mouth, but before she could make all of Hardison's nasty, hopeful dreams come true, someone called her name.

"Parker! Hey, Parker."

Hardison knew that dude's voice like the back of his own hand. He looked at the doorway to Parker's bedroom at the same time she did. She looked way too composed for what was going down.

Eliot walked out in a motherfucking _towel_ , hair all wet around his face. "What the hell happened to--" He stopped dead in the doorway when he saw Hardison. Who couldn't stop staring and wondering if he would even make it halfway to the front door or the window before he died.

Eliot hitched up his towel a little without breaking eye contact.

Parker looked down at her hands, picking at a nail. "Your pants are safe. You don't need them right now."

Eliot's eyes bugged out and he stopped glaring at Hardison to glare at her. "I--Parker! I'm in a goddamn towel!" He gestured down at it, holding it in place with his other hand.

"Yeah," she said a little dreamily. "You are."

"I," said Hardison, but he lost the rest of the sentence and had to try again. "You. Did you just have sex with him?"

"Little while ago," she said, still eyeing the towel like she had horrible, crazy things in mind. Eliot clutched at it a little harder and backed up half a step.

"My heart," Hardison gasped, feeling pain in his chest. It was breaking.

"Wait, you've had sex with _him_?" demanded Eliot, pointing angrily at Hardison and hey, that was just not called for. He sounded like he didn't even believe it.

"Relax, gentlemen. It's all going according to plan. I had sex with you," she said, pointing at Hardison, "and then I had sex with you," she pointed at Eliot, "and I think we can all agree it was pretty great, right?"

They both glared at her.

She rolled her eyes. "And now you two can have sex with _each other_ , and then we can all move on."

Parker sat back into the couch and crossed her arms smugly.

"Did you just con us?" Hardison demanded.

"Was this Sophie's idea or something?" Eliot growled. Only he could look menacing while mostly naked.

Parker snorted. "No! Sophie had nothing to do with it."

Hardison and Eliot both relaxed.

"She actually told me I shouldn't, which was when I decided I was onto something."

"Hey now, just hold on a damn minute. What makes you think that Eliot and I would wanna... do things... to each other?"

Parker just laughed. For a while.

"Come on," she said when she'd calmed down. "It's okay, this is a judgment-free space. You can use my bed if you want. I might come join you later," she said with a wink. Woman was insane. His foster brother had told him, _Alec, don't you never stick it in the crazy_ , and now he understood.

Hardison looked back at Eliot, who was staring at the floor. He'd never seen the guy with his shirt off, really--even when he changed into a costume in front of Hardison, he was quick and efficient about it. He had a serious number of scars all over him. Shrapnel, gunshots, knife wounds... appendix scar, okay, _that_ was a little weird to see. His abs were kind of... glistening? He was still damp from being in the shower. And standing there in a towel that just reached his knees.

Hardison blinked a few times.

When he looked at her again, Parker was giving him a knowing look. Eyebrow raised. That was a Sophie look and she'd copied it and it still worked on her, dammit.

Eliot looked up at Hardison for a long moment. Hardison thought about Parker _joining them_ and shifted in his seat a little.

"I'm going to look for my pants," said Eliot roughly before turning on his heel and disappearing into the bedroom.

Hardison got off the couch without really thinking about it. "I'll--" he started, and then cleared the squeakiness out of his throat. "I'll come help you look," he called.

Parker slapped his ass on his way by. He heard her turn the TV on behind him.

 

THE END


End file.
